Professionalism = “Act like mafiosi”

September 24th, 2007  |  Published in etc  |  3 Comments

Cops Writing Cops:

This is a site for officers getting traffic tickets that ANY normal civilian could get a warning on, verbal or written.  This is a site for cops, about cops, and designed by cops.  Needless to say, we are fed up with hearing about this and think something should be done.  There’s always another ticket down the street.  We are all family and maybe someday you may need one of us to get out of our car and save your sorry ass.  But odds are you’re the cop that doesn’t do anything to begin with. 

Thoreau at UO reminded me of “Cops Writing Cops” and I was appalled all over again.

When they use the word “courtesy,” the delicacy is comparable to that of “wet my beak.” And they use the site to abuse cops who don’t recognize the hereditary “courtesy” to which cop children or relatives are entitled.

And there’s the board, where you get a certain rough authoritarian self-parody:

A female motorist told me recently, “I demand my professional courtesy”.

I felt there was no other proper recourse but do write a summons.


  1. pk says:

    September 26th, 2007 at 8:37 am (#)

    “ANY normal citizen would get a warning.”

    I don’t think I’ve EVER been pulled over by a cop and gotten away with a warning. If they pull me over, I’m getting a ticket. I must be the “other ticket down the street” enabling the clubby camaraderie they idealize. But doesn’t just saying that negate their beef that normal citizens are always getting off with warnings?

    Laugh till you gag at the victim complex that is the authoritarian’s long-burning coal. Their hearts bleed as much as any liberal’s, but only for themselves. Babies.

  2. mph says:

    September 26th, 2007 at 8:52 am (#)

    Yeah. Same here. In my early 20s I was a cop magnet. Tickets in Indiana, Wyoming and Montana in the space of a year, and all for infractions that pale in comparison to the 84 in a 55 one of these guys is complaining about.

    I certainly never got a warning. Once, in fact, I was made to walk back to the cop’s car and I thought I accidentally locked my keys in the car. He laughed at me and said “I’m still gonna write you up.”

  3. pk says:

    September 26th, 2007 at 9:58 am (#)

    It’s fun to imagine this explanation coming out of “ANY normal citizen’s” mouth.

    “As I am driving, I’m really not paying attention to where I am at or how fast I was going.”

    What is that? Is that an excuse, or…what is that? A normal citizen might as well say, “As I am driving, I’m really not paying attention to how drunk I am or how many beers I’ve had. That’s how I drive, and you can suck it, pig.”

    “I was pretty much keeping up with the cars in front of me and next to. Most of the time I had my cruise set at 77-79 in a 65.”

    “Just keeping up with traffic”? So lame, and a cliché, too. I don’t even try this excuse. And cruising at 77-79 in a 65? No way: I go 73-74 and still cringe when I see a speed trap.

    “I told her I wasn’t in a hurry and that I was en route to give a LAW ENFORCEMENT defensive tactics training seminar in Springfield.”

    That’s rich. With the emphasis, you can practically see him with his elbow on the window, laying a big hammy WINK, WINK on a fellow officer. “So I suppose I’ll be ON MY WAY then, eh?”

    “I told her that I have written 20,000 tickets and know the instructions. […] After writing over 20,000 tickets, I think I know what loopholes there are. […] I really didn’t mind the ticket once I knew I was getting one. I’ve written thousands and is it really that bad??”

    “??” Of course not, only 185 bucks worth of groceries. Only pussies complain about tickets. I’m sure his 20,000 ticketees laughed them off–just like HE would’ve, if only….

    “The thing that bothers me is 1) she showed no respect for me. All the years I have worked, the different units I’ve been on, the shitheads that I have arrested didn’t mean squat to her. I’ve given breaks before for people doing 19 miles over the limit. I have even let one go for doing 150+ on LSD.”

    He just needs a little love! And how’d an old softy like him ever rack up 20,000 tickets when he lets pinwheeling acid-heads run wild! “Aw, just a fun-loving kid! I remember my first LSD binge….” (That one really bears further scrutiny. One hundred and fifty miles per hour is very, very fast. I’ve never gone that fast, and I’ll bet you haven’t, either. If he got you pulled over, I imagine an adrenalized cop might very likely pump a few rounds into your skull on general principles. But let’s say he keeps his composure, approaches the warmly idling vehicle, and finds an animated young person behind the wheel who happily–and surprisingly–volunteers that he is, at that moment, tripping like a motherfucker on the communist devil-drug, lysergic acid diethylamide. Or perhaps the young person is incapable of coherent speech, and the officer deduces his condition from his preoccupied state, dilated pupils, flailing limbs, and the wet gobs of chewed-up teddy-bear paper covering the front of his H.O.R.D.E. t-shirt. Either way, IN WHAT WORLD would a cop then cheerily bid the lad continue his merry steeplechase–and then ADMIT IT TO OTHER COPS?! AS A REASON HE SHOULD BE SHOWN “PROFESSIONAL COURTESY”?!)

    “She didn’t know this and that’s the whole idea! She should have given me the break knowing that I go out there everyday and risk my life. She didn’t even see my duty weapon.. :( In plain view… “

    The juxtaposition of “duty weapon” and “[unhappy smiley]” is precious. “She didn’t even see my duty weapon.” What greater symbol of pathos and sacrifice can an officer of the law provide? “In plain view…”

    Unhappy smiley.

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